5 Minor Things I Irrationally Hate Buying

There are some things that people universally hate paying for, medical bills, cell phone bills, international plane tickets and ransoms for example.

Indeed, it does suck paying for those things (especially ransoms), but I also get irritated when I have to buy certain little things.

It’s not that I’m a tightwad (*high-five if you laughed), but there’s just something that rubs me the wrong way (*double high-five) about buying these things.

5. Chapstick

It’s not that I don’t like chapstick. I do. The problem is that I pay $1 for a tiny stick of this stuff and within five days it makes its way into my desk or my car. After that, it’s gone, man. The only things I lose more of on average are pens.

Not once.

Also, has anyone in the history of the world ever finished a tube of Burt’s Bees? The answer is no. No one has ever gotten down to the plastic because chapstick is impossible not to lose.

4. Toiletries

Just to be clear, I’m considering deodorant, toothpaste, hand soap and mouth wash toiletries.

I think I hate buying these things because I feel like they’re things everyone should just get (socialism!). Everyone should be using these things on a daily basis. I shouldn’t have to pay $3-$4 for a decent stick of deodorant when, really, it benefits everyone around me.

3. Condiments

I don’t think buying condiments is necessarily what bothers me; I think it’s the fact that I always forget to buy them. If I run out of ketchup (or catsup for you weirdos), you can bet that I won’t get another bottle for about three weeks.

When I go to the grocery store, I’m looking for things that will provide significant sustenance. Barbecue sauce does not fall under that category.

I should just start stocking up on these bad boys.

Also, if I’m only grabbing a few things, and a bottle of mustard is one of them, I always feel like people think I’m a lonely, sad bachelor dipping frozen corn dogs straight into the bottle.

I swear I’m not doing that.

2. Socks

I constantly buy packages of new socks to replace socks I somehow lose doing laundry, but that’s not the part I hate.

The part I hate is that I never seem to have a greater number of socks. My supply of socks seems to stay static despite how many new packages I buy.

HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?

1. Stamps

I have never had a good experience buying stamps. That’s possibly because I seem only to buy them at the post office, even though I know they’re available at other locations.

The line is always ridiculously long, the people in front of me never know what they want or what they’re doing at the post office even though they’ve had 25 minutes standing in line to think about it, the elderly postal worker at the window never hears me correctly the first three times I say I need stamps, and inevitably I have to use a $20 bill to pay for $1.84’s worth of stamps.

Remind me why we still use these things?

I hate you.

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10 thoughts on “5 Minor Things I Irrationally Hate Buying

  1. Pigeon Heart says:

    1 water
    2 insurance
    3 bus
    My goodness I sound like a Socialist! (;

  2. jfeldt says:

    Things I only want a little bit of that only come in large amounts:
    -Mayonaise
    -Nail Polish
    -Paper Clips
    -Sour Crout
    -Wrapping Paper

  3. I have definitely finished a tube of Burt’s Bee’s. I think its easier for women because you keep lip balm, mascara, pens, and hand sanitizer in particular place… together. Always. If more men invested in a Murse (which I am not suggesting), the lip balm would be a accounted for at all times.

  4. cobras7 says:

    I love this post because i feel the exact same way! For me it’s
    1: electronics- they always suck up about 2 hours per purchase!
    2: shorts- i buy new ones and when i get home they never fit like they did in the store!
    3: printer ink- how con something that small cost that much?!
    4: pens- they never write like i want them to, then i’m stuck with them!

    anyway how do you come up with these topics?

  5. Karen says:

    Paper goods. Not the kind you keep, but the kind you buy just to throw away.
    toilet paper, paper towels, tissue, napkins and feminine pads.

  6. vivianaayre says:

    1. I don’t have tube chapstick so I guess I can’t comment on that bit.
    2. I’m female so I DEFINITELY agree about prices.
    3. I rarely use condiments because I always forget about them. XDDD
    4. I won’t lie, I’m currently out of socks. You reminded me I have to buy fifty packs so I’ll at least have two pairs tomorrow.
    5. Being a teen, I never use stamps. Email all the way. Though I still feel sad that I never get letters… hypocrisy or just being silly?

  7. thekateway says:

    About 3 weeks ago, I was within a day or so of finishing the first tube of chapstick I could ever remember getting to the end of. I got so excited that I jumped the gun and tweeted about it, which probably says more about my lack of things to tweet about that day than anything else. That night, after finally remembering to buy laundry detergent following 3 days of failed laundry attempts, I ended up washing the chapstick in my jeans pocket. I may have lost the chapstick, but I learned many valuable life lessons.

    I’d still trade them for the chapstick, though.

  8. Luther says:

    My sister has had about 10 things of chap stick over a two month span of time. If you think about it its really funny, but just because its stupid and way too many.

  9. jezibelle says:

    Imagine my surprise when I realized that you can put money in the MAILBOX and the postal worker will leave actual STAMPS for you WITHOUT having to go to the post office! I think I got so excited that I wet myself a little bit.

    Imagine my disappointment when I realized that I live in the country where mailboxes do not have keys and became paranoid that 15 year old hoodlums will come and steel a) the money I leave or b) my stamps (because we all know how much hoodlums enjoy using stamps)… Which puts me back at the drawing board.

  10. So true about the chapstick and socks! I’ve actually just decided to buy a new chapstick just about every chance I get. So, I randomly find one when I don’t need it, but usually– a search does precede finding one in times of want.

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