To most people, November means Thanksgiving, the end of the baseball season and social acceptance of Christmas music in the car, home or workplace.
To the male populace of country it also means beards. That’s right; “No Shave November” is upon us again. Now, I’m under the impression that you should already have a beard before November (actually you should always have a beard). However, this year I was convinced to do a “No Shave November” beard contest with two co-workers. I plan on documenting my progress here.
At first, I didn’t see much point in participating. My co-workers look like they just graduated high school. I’m practically guaranteed a win. But another co-worker said there should be at least one person in the competition that can actually grow a full beard.
It was hard to argue with that point.
It was harder to deal with the prospect of shaving my already lumberjack-like beard to start with a clean slate. I can think of few things I’ve been more nervous about in the last year.
I haven’t been completely clean shaven in nearly two years, and there’s a reason for that. When I’m sans facial hair, I look like Homer Simpson on the rare occasions he shaved in episodes. I attribute it to the fact that I have virtually no chin (thanks Mom).
I went through with it, though.
Frankly, I think I just look better with the beard, and I already like wearing plaid shirts—so there’s that. Plus, once you have a beard, there’s really no incentive to get rid of it. It eliminates shaving, makes you look more mature and becomes a distinguishing characteristic. It does, however, seem to prevent you from becoming president (seriously, name the last president with a beard).
Needless to say, today started with uneasiness.
Upon waking up this morning, my first thought was “My god, what have you done?” My mental state didn’t get any better from there. I felt naked; it’s the same sensation I get when I forget to wear my wrist watch, only times 100.
As I walked out to my car this morning, I felt a strange sensation. It was the first time in ages I felt the wind on my face, and, to my surprise, my face actually felt cold. I didn’t like it. When I got to work, one co-worker took a glance at me and started hysterically laughing. Another co-worker walked by and did a double take straight out of a bad sitcom. I really hope to keep those encounters to minimum in the next few days.
There is good news, though.
I already have some stubble, and I expect a decent five O’clock shadow by tomorrow.
Check back for pictures and status updates.